Telling Miss Lilli and other weekend news

Thank god that is over with.

Tony & Debbie brought Lilli down on Saturday morning so that a) I could tell her what was going on and b) we could all have lunch.   All bad news goes better with food you know.

It was at first a little surreal.  Everyone was just talking about normal stuff and taking their cues from me.  After a few minutes of this, I realized I just needed to come out with it.  I started crying a little and told her that I had some news for her.  We all went into the living room and she sat next to me but opted to snuggle into my mom.

She already knew about cancer and that it was a bad thing.  I used “her words” and told her what was going on with me specifically.  There were some tears.  Lots of hugs.  She’s putting my name in her class’s prayer book at school.   I think she came away from it hopeful but worried.   She told me a few jokes and then went out of the room to play.

I feel so much better now that that is over.  She is getting baptized on 8/15 and I told her I would definitely be there even if I have to break out of the hospital!  (anyone up for a patient heist?)

We went to lunch at Toby Keith’s Bar & Grill in the Victoria Gardens mall.  (As an aside, the restaurant is oddly decorated to me but they have really decent food.  My favorite is the steak sandwich (nice piece of seasoned steak), the mac and cheese (bacon!) and the jalapeno butter that comes with the cornbread.  So FREAKING GOOD. )   When we left and were doing the hugs, Lilli just wouldn’t let me go.  I’m not sure who needed to hug who more, but it helped both of us.

The rest of the day was a blur.  I go from feeling like a normal person, to little miss angry, then to feeling numb.  The numb feeling might have to do with the amount of Ativan I’ve been taking (no more than what the doctor prescribed).  That stuff is my bestest friend ever.  My blood sugars are actually coming down now that I’m not feeling so much stress.

I didn’t get much done Sunday.  Just a trip to Target and breakfast at my favorite Brandon’s Diner where I saw a few people that I haven’t seen in ages.  Yay.

The best best best news ever came from my dear USC friend, Lori.   Someone came into her life earlier this year that fully appreciates how amazing she is.  He made the best decision of his life and asked her to marry him.

Congratulations Lori & Dan!!!  I wish you nothing but happiness and can’t wait to be at your wedding next year!!!!



8 Comments on “Telling Miss Lilli and other weekend news”

  1. Lori Lewis says:

    Thank you, sweetie, for the shout out! Dan and I cannot wait to celebrate with you next year at our wedding – once you kick this cancer’s ass, we’ll have even more joy to celebrate 🙂


  2. Barbara DiCarlo says:

    Pam stay strong and know you have many friends here to support you. Even if we are older we still are here to help you through this time. Call me would love to chat . Maybe even tell you a naughty joke. Let me leave you with this as you move forward. “God does not promise a comfortable journey, only a safe landing. Wishing you the best. Love, Barbara DiCarlo


  3. Jan Krugr says:

    Pam and Billie, I thought of you all day on Saturday and am so glad to read your blog today. Hang on, fight on during your appointment tomorrow. Xxoo


  4. Pamela Lata says:

    Hey Pam, received the updates from Colleen. Time passes really slowly when you are going through all of this. It feels like you fell into a empty well with no end. Keep busy and keep your mind occupied with positive thoughts. It’s hard to do. I slept a lot which helped me. This too shall pass and we can talk about it over breakfast at Branden’s. Give me a shout when you need to talk or have any questions. I’ve been to hell and back. Why do bad things happen to nice people.I think it’s to test our sense of hummer. That no one can take ♥


  5. Thinking of you today and hoping you get some positive news. I agree with Barbara D., we may be old farts but we can still help out if you need it. xoxoxo joyceeeeee


  6. Karen Stember says:

    Another old fart chiming in… fight on and know that your mom is being looked after now too….glad she made it to the retiree brunch yesterday and hope to see her at Brandon’s TT tonight.


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