I would have sworn that I’ve updated this blog since last September but apparently not. There has been lots going on. I’ll make this as short as possible so that I can get everyone up to today without making it a novel.
When I last updated, I had just gotten the penis radiation drawn on me. I reread that entry and realized that I failed to note that when they positioned my arm for the new radiation drawing, they pulled my left arm up higher than I was flexible post-surgery/lumpectomy. This was exceedingly painful and I was basically screaming at them to let me move it. They kept asking for 5 more minutes and, when it was over, I was crying and in incredible pain.
The next morning, I woke up and my left shoulder/arm/side were at a pain level 11 and I couldn’t move/lift my arm. No strength in my hand either. If I needed my arm to be in a different spot, I had to pick it up with my right hand and move it. I can’t remember back to what we did other than pain meds. I still have massive pain in this arm and shoulder 9 months later.
Because I couldn’t move my arm, I had to stop the radiation. Got to take the penis outline off of me!!!
Then I got admitted because my platelets went down to 4 and I got a nosebleed from hell. I was about to be discharged from the hospital a few days later when I got a humongous nose bleed and the doctors said, Nope you are staying. My nose bled for about 12 hours. The next day some doctors from ENT came in and were going to clean out my nose and cauterize the bleed spot so that I could go home. They didn’t give me any anti anxiety or pain med but went in with those scary ass tweezers and suckers and stuff. Apparently they saw something kind of far back up my Right Nostril and wanted to get it out. I’m screaming in pain so they start giving me IV Dilauded. Well my adrenaline was so high that my body didn’t react to the Dilauded so they gave me more and then Ativan and then who knows. After 4.5 hours of being tortured, they finally just put a ton of packing in and called it a night. My mom was there and can attest to the fact that it was incredibly traumatic. I started to relax and fall asleep and mom went home.
Apparently, the next morning, I decided to go for a walk. I don’t remember this or most of that day. The housekeeper saw me walk out of my room with blood all over me and the floor. Then I turned around back into my room. She came after me and found me on the floor unconscious with blood pouring from my mouth. They called a CODE on me and when I finally woke up enough, I was in the ICU with a second IV and my entire family and a few extra friends were there. Apparently the hospital called my mom and brother and basically told them that I was not going to make it. They thought that I was having a brain hemorrhage as most of them didn’t know what had happened the day before with the ENTs. I was in and out of it after they were able to wake me up and respond to questions. Next thing I know, my aunt is flying in from North Carolina and my friend Sue was flying in from Philadelphia. It’s been considered that I was possibly OD’d on pain meds during my ENT visit but noone knows exactly what I got. I was out of ICU the next day and home a few days later. I got to have a nice visit in hospital with my USC besties and a nice visit with my Aunt and Sue after I got discharged.
So now, I continue to get nosebleeds that last a minimum of 2 and go up to 14 hours. I’ve learned how to contain them more to the 2 hour range. It’s ALWAYS that same right nostril, so I’m convinced that they just completely FUCKED up my nose. I refuse to let the ENTs near me.
Again my platelets were crazy low, so I stopped taking the Eligard and Faslodex. My oncologist at the time pretty much told me it was a waste of time anyway. I basically decided not to treat the cancer for a while.
I ended up in the hospital again in December for a few days but can’t remember why.
At the end of January, I got a small lump under my jaw. I thought it might be an infected tooth but the lump grew to be golf ball sized and you could totally see it. Into the hospital we go. They attempted to drain it (so fun!) but it ended up being an infection. I couldn’t open my mouth wider than to get a straw in so I was on a mushy food diet and again my pain level was an 11. It was so bad, I had to go on a Dilauded pump with extra meds before and after I ate. I went from 128 to 108 in two weeks. I had to have a CT scan with contrast and because I’m allergic to the contrast they had to give me 150mg over 12 hours before the test of Prednisone. The prednisone actually took the swelling down noticibly so I was on a low dose of Pred for a week after discharge. I was inpatient for 2 weeks. Turns out the infection was caused by a blocked salivary gland so I have to eat sour candy every day. Sour Patch Kids are the best.
Now I’m back up to 112 lbs but I’m having problems gaining weight. I need the weight in case I get sick so it won’t be dangerous if I lose weight while sick. Life is strange.
Within a few weeks after that, I was starting to have massive pressure in my chest and shortness of breath. After tons of scans and another thoracentesis, it was determined that my breast cancer, that had spread to my right pleural lining, had now moved to my left pleural lining and there were tumors in my lungs. I was given a new oncologist and they started me back on the Eligard and Faslodex, even though my platelets are still low. I get those shots once a month.
At the end of March, I was having severe shortness of breath and I was admitted again. I got another thoracentesis and an order for at home Oxygen. So now I’m connected to O2 tanks and compressors most of the time. When my blood count gets low, I have to wear it all the time but, like today, I would forget about it for a few hours and still do okay. This is a forever thing.
My last admit to USC was the first week of April – so I’ve officially gone 2.5 months without going inpatient. HURRAH! I get tired easily so I’m not going out a ton but I can see friends and go on one walking errand a day or every two days. This is better than a month or so ago when I couldn’t walk across the house without gasping for air!
I go in every Wednesday for lab tests and a shot of medicine that is supposed to help with my Platelets. Every fourth Wednesday, I get the Eligard and Faslodex shots. I feel unwell after the Platelet shots until the next day. The day I get all the shots, I feel terrible for a few days. I see my new oncologist on the “big shot” days. I really like her – she seems positive that we can slow down or stop the cancer progress. I’m definitely optimistic.
I’m also getting transfusions pretty much every week now. My hematologist is worried that if my nose really bleeds, my blood count will go too low and it could cause cardiac arrest or stroke. FUN!!! My diabetes is hanging in there…. I’m still here so all is well!!!
I am encouraged by my labs. My oncologist is running the CA 15-3 test every month. This is the tumor marker test for metastatic breast cancer. People without cancer will have a level of 30 or less. My first test a few month ago was 385. My most recent test was 297. Going down is a good thing!!! Fingers crossed that it keeps going at that direction. I did some research and some Stage 4 patients have a 15-3 in the multiple thousands. I’m happy with my little number.
On fun notes, since I last wrote, I have seen a bunch of musicals: Hedwig and the Angry Inch, Amelie, Fun Home, Finding Neverland, The King and I, and Into the Woods. In August & September, I’m seeing Hamilton (WORK!). Mom and I renewed our season tickets for the Pantages for next year and having tickets to Aladdin, Love Never Dies, School of Rock, The Color Purple, On Your Feet and Waitress. I’m also hoping to see Something Rotten and Bright Star this fall.
My mom turned a big birthday this past March and so my brother, sister-in-law, niece and I took her to Universal Studios and we basically spent the entire day in Harry Potter World. I got a great deal from AAA so we actually have annual passes. The summer is blocked out but we don’t have any interest in going in the summer anyways. We are looking forward to hitting the stores in the front of the park next time!
We just had an amazing visit with my cousin Mike and his wife Megan. I hadn’t seen Mike for about 17 years and I had never met Megan other than facebook. They are a wonderful couple and we had a great visit. Megan has a cousin out in LA who took them all over Hollywood for a day or two. We spent the time just talking and talking. Hopefully we can make it to Austin (where they live) within the next year – it sounds like a blast!!! I also have friends and other family that live nearby that I would love to see. Fingers crossed!!!
Next up for me is labs and the platelet shot tomorrow.
Oh, and I have a new cat, Hallie. I had to put down Chester last August. I adopted Hallie in late September. She just turned one in April. I call her “Hurricane Hallie”. She’s mostly sweet then she goes crazy out of nowhere. Typical cat!
Last Friday, I was at the hospital for my transfusion and ran into my hematologist. She asked me how I was feeling and the dam broke. I told her that I was unhappy with my oncologist and she told me that she would talk to my surgeon about it. I also decided to not wait for anyone to get back to me but schedule my own appointment with my surgeon. So i see her this Wednesday afternoon.
I got a call today that my oncologist was able to get a PET/CT approved. They will be able to tell WTF is going on with my back and see if my cancer has spread.
I’m nervous about the PET/CT, not only because of the machine but because of what they might find. I don’t think they will find anything other than what we know but here’s always that chance. One thing about cancer, any ache and pain that you would’ve previously blown off becomes “OMG has my cancer spread?” I’ve talked with some survivors and they say they are always on edge. Ugh.
No matter how nervous I am, I HAVE to get through his scan. Luckily I have done this before. Remember this?
If if I don’t complete this scan my oncologist’s head will seriously freaking EXPLODE!
Luckily I have a little KINKY BOOTS at the Pantages Theater on Thursday night and birthday doings on Saturday and Sunday to look forward to!!!
FIGHT ON USC! BEAT CAL!
Today is my 1 year cancerversary.
From what I’ve seen online, there are many different ways to determine this date: date of surgery, last chemo, last radiation, the one year clearance, etc…
I’ve chosen my date of official diagnosis.
It was last year on a Wednesday (after an evening of leaving a shit-ton of messages on my doctor’s and her NP’s voice mails demanding to know why they weren’t calling me with the biopsy results after they said they would but instead wanting me to schedule an appointment that Friday) that my doctor called me from her way into work and gave me the news.
This set off months of tests and “when is surgery?” – if you’ve read the whole blog you know the issues.
Where I am today:
1. Still have my tumor. (I always say “tumor” in the Schwarzenegger voice – it’s a must)
2. I’m keeping my tumor for the foreseeable future.
I have a new oncologist. My last one departed USC for University of Texas. My new doctor is so chillaxed about the whole thing. Just what I need. She is totally cool with not doing any chemo, rads or surgery. It’s my other doctors that are freaked out about the no surgery thing. My hematologist scheduled an appointment with me to make sure that I understood that medicine won’t hold me forever.
Tamoxifen isn’t a cure for cancer, just a bit of insurance after chemo, rads and surgery. So I’m well aware that it won’t be a cure for me, that we may just handle things in “prevent the spread” mode. When I decided against surgery due to other complications from my other issues, I fully realized what my choice meant. Not. An. Idiot.
Although, this stupid drug does induce brain fog.
And muscle and joint pain.
And weight gain. (10 lbs up, bitches)
And a new need for glasses.
And emotions that dart and weave all over the place.
Did I mention weight gain?
Anyway, so it’s been a year. Things seem good. My tumor did shrink a tiny bit between July and August.
There’s also plenty to look forward to.
My niece is coming for the weekend this Saturday!
And….I’m seeing Kinky Boots for my birthday in November!
And…I’m seeing Brian Setzer Orchestra at Christmas!
AND, The best of all….
9 MORE DAYS UNTIL TROJAN FOOTBALL!!!
Stuff before the cancer update:
1. Yes, I am SUPER happy that Lane Kiffin was fired. Coaching is about Leadership and he does not have that skill. USC football needs a coach that will get their head up and out from behind a big play card and cheer and celebrate with the team. I think that the interim coach, Coach Orgeron, totally gets this and will do a great job for the rest of the season. I am hoping that he is in consideration for head coach. Everyone likes him and he is a fantastic recruiter. I’m still FIGHT ON for my Trojans. This week is a bye week but a week from tonight we are going to BEAT THE WILDCATS!!!
2. iOS 7 came out for the iPhone within the last week. Apple is definitely pushing for everyone to purchase an iPhone 5, 5c, or 5s. I just upgraded to iOS 7 on my iPhone 4. While it seems to work well, I can definitely tell that apps are taking longer to run. I’ve had to cut out of apps twice because they just hung while doing some simple processing. I think I’m going to upgrade to a 5s (if I can) next month as a birthday present to myself. General Recommendation: If you have a iPhone 4 or 4s and it’s doing everything you need it to do, don’t upgrade to 7. Just realize that over time, some of your apps won’t work.
3. If you follow me on Facebook, you’ll know that two of my anemia friends have been going through medical hell. Happily, one of my friends just got home today after 3 weeks in the hospital with ischemic colitis. This is a side effect of the anemia as there aren’t enough red blood cells to fuel the colon. They managed to fix it with two weeks straight of antibiotics and a broth diet. So happy she is home!!! My other friend went into the hospital and had a colon issue as well but it became a septic infection. She’s been on a ventilator and on sedation for over a week. They also diagnosed her with both colon and liver cancer. In good news, she has been successfully weaned off the ventilator. Please continue to pray for her. Her name is Michelle.
I had an appointment with a new doctor yesterday. His name is Dr. Tripathy and he is an oncologist at Norris. Now, I have high expectations for my USC doctors and he totally exceeded them. (As have all of my doctors at Norris – go there fast if you get cancer) First off, he doesn’t usually do clinic appointments on Wednesdays, but knew that it was convenient for our schedule so he came in. My next appointment is on a Wednesday as well. He is super nice and explained EVERYTHING in technical and layman terms. It was quite clear that he had gone over my history and spoken with my other doctors and had a plan mostly in place. Some things are still being set in stone but he had the next step ready to go.
So here is the newest plan:
I am taking Tamoxifen as of this morning. This is the drug of choice for hormone receptive breast cancer like mine. Basically my cancer cells have little hands that like to grab onto passing estrogen and use the estrogen to make more little cancer cells. The tamoxifen mimics estrogen cells to trick the cancer cells into thinking they are grabbing estrogen. The tamoxifen then takes up all the “hands” of the cancer cells and the actual estrogen has nothing to hang on to, therefore stopping the growth of the cancer. This medicine can also get rid of microscopic spots and shrink the original tumor. This is given to pre-menopausal women and usually for 5-10 years.
The downside of tamoxifen (you know there was a downside) is that it can cause uterine cancer and blood clots. Dr. T says that this happens mostly in women 60 and over, but we will monitor things.
After a while on Tamoxifen we will do another (probably) ultrasound to reevaluate the tumor, hoping that it has shrunk. They definitely are doing surgery. Right now I’m in the middle of a big project with one of my clients so I’ve asked for the surgery to be no earlier than the second week of December. That seemed fine with him and I just got an email from my hematologist that that was good for her as well. They still don’t know if it will be a lumpectomy or a left breast mastectomy. I’m hoping for a lumpectomy so that I won’t have to spend the holidays in bed. That would SUCK! Either way, I will just be happy to have it GONE! AWAY WITH THE BEAST!!!
Radiation is still being considered. Dr. T thinks that I would do fine but Dr. O (hematologist) is not comfortable. I would really love to be at the meeting where they duke it out!!!
I am also participating in a research study. The first part already happened. The initial part is to analyze the doctor/patient interactions at at the first encounter – so I filled out a short questionnaire, the encounter with Dr. T was audiotaped and afterwards I filled out a post-encounter questionnaire. In three months, they will get back in touch with me and have me do a followup questionnaire.
I’m also signing up for another study where they will take the extra tissue from my surgery and study it for something. Hey, I’m not going to need it!
Further down the line after surgery and after things are somewhat settled, I might go on a different medicine called Lupron. This medicine basically shuts down your ovaries to result in a forced menopause. This can be taken with tamoxifen or with a certain group of medicines called aromatase inhibitors. The Lupron kills the ovaries and the AI shuts down estrogen production in the other areas of the body. There are pros and cons to this regimen as well but the pros are that it doesn’t cause uterine cancer or blood clots.
*WHEW* That was quite the update.
My next appointments are on Weds, Oct 23rd with both Dr. T and Dr. M (surgeon). My expectation is that we will set a surgery date and type of surgery.
Oh! I also had to change my anti-anxiety medicine. I have been taking a low dose of Prozac for years (at least 10!) and as of this evening am now taking Effexor. Apparrently Prozac can make Tamixifen not work. We don’t want that. So if I seem a bit odd for the next few weeks, I’m adjusting. I feel a little floaty right now in fact.
When you get Breast Cancer, all of a sudden you are besieged with information about how the skin care products that you’ve used all of your life are no longer safe to use. It is all so confusing. If you look at the lists of the super green – organic-bloggers, nothing is safe. You should just lock yourself in a closet with Baking Soda and Coconut oil and never come out.
I’ve posted before about my needing to find a non-aluminum deodorant which resulted in the Tom’s of Maine peeling fire pits from hell. To update you, I let the peeling go down and then switched to Crystal Essence with Chamomile and White Tea. That didn’t result in fire pits but did start to make my skin peel again. I ditched that one too.
The second evil I face now: Parabens
I’m not one to hop onto a panic “don’t use this” bandwagon, but I heard enough bad stuff that I looked into it.
Parabens: A quick overview
These little devils are in almost everything that you put on your body: shampoos, conditioners, face soaps and lotions, body lotions, makeup, you name it. For most people, these aren’t an issue but for BC patients that have hormone positive markers, we have to stay away. BC treatment for hormone + includes medicine that basically shuts down estrogen receptors which the cancer feeds off of. Parabens mimic estrogen and can be absorbed into your system through the skin. There was a study in 2012 that took tissue from hormone+ breast cancer tissue and almost all of them contained high levels of parabens.
So, I have to stay away.
Do you know that items without parabens don’t smell good? Some of them are unscented but some of them just smell foul. I have wash my hands fifty times to get the excess off. blech.
This is my new vs old regime:
New: Straight, Unrefined Virgin Organic Coconut Oil.
Old: Dove – baby powder scent
Review: This stuff works great. I poured some of the Coconut Oil in the jar into a tupperware that I keep in the bathroom. You just rub in into your pits like you would a lotion on your legs. It keeps the skin nice and soft and I’ve had no “odor” issues at all. You do have to let it dry before you put on your clothes. Bonus is that there is no white residue.
New: Burt’s Bees “GUD” product line
Old: Anything on sale
Review: It’s just been a few days but I think it will work out. The products are $6 a piece which is EXCELLENT . I’ve seen other paraben free stuff that was $17 a piece. The shampoo doesn’t lather up like you might expect but that is because there are no lathery chemicals present. The conditioner doesn’t feel like it is conditioning but after I blow dry my hair, it’s soft.
New: Dr. Bronner’s Castile soap in Tea-Tree
Old: Anything that smelled good or was very moisturizing (Dove, LUSH, etc…)
Review: I had tried Dr. Bronner’s years ago but I bought the Almond version which smells great in the bottle but not so much on me. It also doesn’t lather much. I gave it a whirl again (it has 18 uses) and bought the tea tree version. Tea Tree oil is a great, natural anti-bacterial agent and with all of the cuts and scrapes I get (thank you kitty cat!) I need the help. I’ve heard that regular anti-bacterial soap is too harsh so this seemed like a nice compromise. Plus! No parabens or odd chemicals. I’m definitely going to stick with Dr. Bronners.
New: Burts Bees Baby Bee lotion
Old: I had a few, Jergens, Ultra Bond, Suave (all Parabens!)
Review: My skin is super dry and I put it on my legs this morning. They still feel really smooth and happy. This is one of the products that totally smells foul. Once it is rubbed into your skin, you can’t smell it but DO NOT get up close and personal with it when you first pump it into your hands. So Gross. It’s good enough that I will finish the bottle (12 oz) but I will probably switch to a different Burt’s Bees product when I run out.
Face Soap & Lotion:
New: Dr. Bronner’s Mild-Baby bar soap, Boots Organics Witchhazel toner, Boots organics day cream, Clinique eye cream. At night, I use coconut oil for my night cream.
Old: Clinique 3-step system, Boots Sensitive Skin wash, toner and cream.
Review: I love the Dr. Bronner soap – I feel like I finally get my face squeaky clean without it drying out too much. The Witchhazel toner is something I’ve had for a while but it works great. The day cream I’m on the fence about. It does a pretty good job and I will finish the jar but I might go to a Burts bees product (same price). The Clinique eye cream is chock full of parabens but I love it and it was expensive and I’m finishing the jar. So there. The coconut oil at night was something to get used to. A little goes a long way and even if you just barely cover your skin it will feel oily. Thing is, I’ve had no breakouts. I’m seeing some positive changes in my skin.
Cuticle cream: LUSH’s Lemony Flutter. It does have a mild paraben in it called Limonene but that is because of the natural lemon in it. (Fruits have parabens. Nothing is safe! AAAAAAH!) This is the best stuff ever! It works great as a cuticle cream but you can use it anywhere you have rough skin (Elbows! Knees!)
Makeup: I started using Bareminerals a month or so ago and I love it! I was excited to read that it isn’t on the “do not use” list. I use the powder and not the liquid foundation they have now. I also use the blush. For lipstick/gloss, I use LUSH emotional brilliance in Perpective. (both Paraben and Petroleum free) My mascara is also from LUSH and it contains parabens but they claim to use 1/2 the normal amount. It’s the only mascara that actually works for me so I’m keeping it. My eyeshadow is covergirl which is probably not great but I don’t have the $$ to switch over to bareminerals.
Powder: I use a non-talc product from LUSH called “Silky Underwear.” It’s made from cornstarch and cocoa butter and it is amazing. A little goes a long way with this as well so even though it is expensive it will last ages.
In addition to the deodorant, I did have some other misses:
1. Using Dr. Bronner Tea Tree Castile soap as a shampoo. It is listed as one of the 18 things you can do with their magic soap and my hair is pretty resiliant so I gave it a try. Not a good idea. It did a good job of stripping all the build up from previous shampoos but it also stripped all the moisture from my hair. It felt really dry and horrible. They say you can follow up with an Apple Cider Vinegar rinse but I decided to just buy a new shampoo.
2. Using Coconut Oil as a hair conditioner. My plan was to use the Dr. Bronners as a shampoo and Coconut Oil as the conditioner. People have reported that this works well for them. This did not work well for me. I used the tiniest amount (less than a teaspoon) and rubbed it through my hair and my hair got incredibly heavy and wouldn’t do ANYTHING! I couldn’t even get it to dry completely. Let’s just say I only went on errands where I could use a drive through. The next day it took me two regular shampoos to get it all out. GROSS!
So that’s what I’ve been doing. If you have any suggestions, put them in the comments!
Apparently Coconut Oil is the baking powder of oils and can do just about anything (google it).
I’m just never putting it in my hair again.
One of the fun facts about breast cancer is that you are supposed to discontinue using deodorants that contain aluminum chlorohydrate and parabens.
Which deodorants contain both these things? Oh, just EVERY SINGLE ONE ON THE MARKET!!!
Aluminum chlorohydrate is used for the antiperspirant side of Deodorant/Antiperspirant. Apparently it is supposed to plug up the sweat pores to keep you dry and this has the potential to increase the risk of breast cancer. Basically, I’m going to be single-boobed, sweaty chick. Lovely.
There are a bunch of breast cancer approved deodorants but they either cost a ton or they are mail order only.
I decided to pick up a good strong brand that I know – Tom’s of Maine. Lavender scented. No Aluminum. Sounds great. $5.00 at Target. Much more than the $3 Suave 2 pack I normally use but this is my new reality.
For the first few days, Tom’s worked great. The lavender smell was very light and I didn’t notice any foul smell coming off me at the end of the day. I don’t sweat much anyway but even on those ridiculously hot days, I didn’t feel much wetness.
Fast Forward to Sept 10. I’m changing into my jammies before bed and I notice odd clumps under my arm. I thought they were perhaps the deodorant pilling up or something, but NO! My skin is peeling off!!! I have a ring of peeling skin that surrounds my underarm. GAH! I had to put it on again yesterday and today. More peeling! Today, that whole area feels like sandpaper…fiery fiery sandpaper. AAAAH!
So, Tom’s with its lavender scent is in the trash. This afternoon, I went to the Vitamin Shoppe in the Colonies in Upland and they had a bigger selection of BC approved deodorants. (they even have the pink ribbon on some of them!).
This is the one I chose: Crystal Essence with Chamomile & Green Tea
Apparently it is “the perfect combination of complementary aromas”
I don’t care. I just don’t want the PITS OF FIRE!
Full review in a few days.
Yesterday I posted that I had gotten the news that the court had decided that I wasn’t myself and that I actually was black and lived in Nevada. I called the traffic court, left a message and it turns out, SOMEONE BELIEVED ME!!!
I got a call at 7am (which I didn’t answer because…7am) from the traffic person who gave me her name and number and told me that they had reviewed my issue and had determined that it was a case of mistaken identity. They had already contacted the FTB to get my refund started. HURRAH!
Then I see that I have a message from the FTB giving me a number to call back. When I called back, I got an actual person who asked me to fax over some stuff to get the reimbursement started. Apparently the $$ taken out of my bank has not cleared their systems (it can take 3-4 weeks) but they are preparing the documentation now so it doesn’t take as long. I’m at the end of the 3-4 weeks so I should be getting my $$ soon!!!!
Then there is the issue of the ticket, hold on my license and failure to appears (thank you, Nevada Pam). I called the court where the ticket was given and talked to a nice lady. After some explanation, she reviewed my stuff and agreed that it was not my ticket. She also said that the DMV is known for getting people mixed up. She corrected the problem over the phone and said she was going to send in the right documentation to the DMV to remove the address. YAY! This saves me a trip to the courthouse to present my case to a judge.
So I call DMV to see if they need documentation other than the stuff from the court. They looked at my CDL record and saw the incorrect address but told me that there was no sign of a ticket/failure to appears. Yay for the lady at the court! There is nothing else for me to do but wait a few weeks and check my drivers record to make sure that everything got cleaned up.
I’m so relieved. SO RELIEVED. I’ve been really stressed out and having this taken care of is a load off my mind.
In other news:
I’m still recovering from my fall from bed. I’m sore all over. Still laughing at myself.
I’ve been a patient at USC Norris for a long time and it always seemed like once a person is diagnosed with cancer, the docs push all the procedures, tests and surgery on that patient super fast. I never thought that was very fair – it’s an overwhelming situation and perhaps they should go a little slower so the patient can get a grip.
Now I understand why. I’ve known for 2.5 weeks and my surgeon/oncologist appointment isn’t for another 6 days.
That is too many days.
I’ve become paranoid and anxious about my body. In my head, any ache or pain is a new tumor. In the last few days, I’ve diagnosed myself with lung and ovarian cancer. I also felt a mass in my right breast this morning while laying down. While standing up, that mass ended up being a rib bone. I also have too much time to research procedures and medications on the internet. I have quite a few treatment options set up for myself. Can’t wait to hear what the doctor says 🙂
I’m going nuts!
Luckily, I have joined some online support groups and the way I’m feeling and acting seems to be perfectly normal.
Again, thank goodness for Ativan!!!
As part of this whole deal, I had to stop taking my birth control pill. This is the first week I’ve been off of it and interestingly enough, my blood sugars are going down to a normal-for-me level. I’m eating the same and it is still going down. This is excellent news as cancer feeds off of glucose.
I’ve also gained 5 lbs. Right. In. My. Stomach. So my fat pants are tight around my stomach and are about 3 sizes too big in the butt. My phlebotomist yesterday made fun of me a little. Now is the time to keep my diet in check as no-breasts, big stomach and small butt is just not a look I’m going for!
I still have the Aplastic Anemia so tomorrow is a transfusion day!